I haven’t been into the idea of Halloween since I was a child. I remember dressing up and going trick or treating when I was young. The Halloween of 1992 marked my first Halloween as a T1, and my last time going trick or treating. It wasn’t fun anymore for me….a child doesn’t want to go out to get a big bucket of candy and then be told ‘oh…you can’t eat that candy!’ (this was pre-MDI days, candy didn’t fit well with a Lente/Regular regimen that was only a few months old and was still being worked out by my dad and my endo).
I did dress up the next few years and hand out candy to trick or treaters who came to our home, but that soon caused me to become bitter. After all, I was a kid. I’d have rather been out getting candy and then being able to eat it.
So eventually I stopped dressing up and handing out candy, too.
I think the last time I dressed up for Halloween was 1996 or so, when I was about 10 years old.
During my late teens and early twenties all my friends always got dressed up and went to parties or bars for Halloween and I was always invited along….and I’ve never gone.
For me, the fun of Halloween was ruined when I was a kid and realized I couldn’t eat the candy I got trick or treating, unlike other children. Halloween made me face the fact that I wasn’t like other kids.
I am now a successful adult using an insulin pump and I know I can eat candy whenever I want, in moderation. However, that feeling of exclusion leftover from my childhood runs deeper than this consolation, and still leads me to dislike Halloween.
This will be another year I don’t dress up or celebrate in any way.
Am I alone in this, DOC? Is anyone else out there an anti-Halloween PWD, too, even though you know it’s irrational?